Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Fashion Through the Ages

My girlfriends and I were recently group texting regarding our bad fashion choices and collective dorkery of our youth. My closest girlfriend sent photographic evidence, so I felt compelled to share snippets of mine as well. I couldn't narrow it down to just one look, because as I looked through my albums, I realized that my own style was very uniquely evolving in its own mutant-dork way.

Please enjoy the varying questionable hair and fashion choices I made through my youth; it's amazing that I had friends with the various assortment of vests and the conscious choice of sporting a mullet and a perm ...

Age 8. The hoop dress and curled too-short bangs atop a mullet, Christmas morning. 

Age 9, the mullet continues ...  super cool shirt, huh? Yeah. I really thought so. Same with my awesome fanny pack (pictured).

Age 11. Jesus. I want to kick my OWN ass looking at this. Did I really think I was going to make it through middle school with this look!? A home-made vest? A herringbone chain? I look like DJ in that episode of Full House where she goes to school thinking she looks all awesome and instead is dressed identically to her teacher. PS WHERE are my eyebrows?

Age 12. The tie-dye onesie bib-type whatever that was. And fake Keds. And slouch socks. Growing out "the wedge."

Age 12, continued. More fake Keds. More slouch socks. And collection of sweet, sweet troll-dolls. Note the cinched V-neck tee. And perm. And music stand for my flute. Where is my effing Caboodle!?

Age 13. I legitimately promise I wanted a boyfriend, I swear.

Age 13, continued. I really, REALLY thought this outfit was cool. Like, off-the-charts badass. It was a body suit, that I got at the MALL, in an actual JUNIORS SHOP. Note the tulle ruffle around the collar and wrists. Note to future self: this is what trying too hard looks like. PPS My boobs didn't come in for another 2 years.

Age 13, continued (again). Okay, this one is actually pretty cool. Look at how AWESOME I am in my PJ shirt! I'm still pissed that I misplaced it after graduation.

Age 14. The 90s essentials; long dangly necklace, oversized rayon print dress, suede granny boots, and blonde hair dye. You actually wish you were this cool.

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